For my daughter..

I hope the world doesn't turn you bitter like it turned me.
I hope you never lose your innocence, and your unbreakable smile.
I hope you never have to stare death in the face and make a choice.
Even if you do, I hope you choose life. Because I didn't. I chose to give up, to give in, and now death follows me everywhere.
I see it in my dreams. When I close my eyes, my eyelids are painted in dripping blood and pain.

I hope you never have to feel the hopelessness and emptiness that I did.
I hope that you never have to be a parental figure for your parents.
I hope that you never have to comfort me, or give me advice, or loan me money.
I will be your mother, and you will be my daughter,
and I will take care of you.
I won't abandon you,
I won't neglect you.
I'll always take care of you,
no matter how I'm feeling.
I won't be selfish.
I won't cry in front of you.
I will always be strong for you,
always fight for you.
I want to spoil you,
but I want you to be strong and independent.
I don't want you to shake in bed at night,
or see men out of the corner of your eye.
I hope you don't have to use sex to feel alive.
I hope you never wake up in a strangers bed.
I hope your mind never blocks things out in order to protect itself.
I hope that you can sleep at night,
get a full 8 hours if you want to.

I hope you are not a prisoner in your own mind.